Long time no chat! I've said before that every experience, good or bad, holds an opportunity to learn something or have some sort of realization. If you don't already know, I decided to shut down Looks Hair & Apparel and focus solely on the blog. It's a decision that I'd been juggling for quite some time, but I finally decided that it was a great experience, but it wasn't something meant for me long term. Would I go back and avoid using the time, effort, money, stress, or disappointments? Not at all! My point being when there's something that you have a desire for, you're most likely going to always wonder what it's like until you achieve it or come to realize it wasn't something you really wanted.
In the cases where years go by and that thing still lingers in your mind, is it better to live forever wondering or just go for it and get your answer? The amount of time it takes to try whatever will still pass if you do it or not. Let's say you really want an Associate Degree. No matter when you do it, it's gonna take 2 years, regardless of if you do it now or wait 5 years. On another note, you'll either love it and get the best possible outcome, or you won't and you'll choose another path. Instead of letting that wonder turn into regret because you're afraid the worst will happen, get it out the way so you have an answer.
This is the lesson I got from running Looks Hair & Apparel. Even though in the end it wasn't the right path for me, it allowed me to gain clarity about what direction I wanted to head in. Sometimes you need to run into a brick wall full speed and fall out. A complete unexpected realization that makes you say, " Didn't see that coming, now what?" It hurts, trust me, but once you learn to change course from something that you felt truly invested in at some point but not anymore… it helps you differentiate between giving up and letting go.
When you give up, it's because of something you're not willing to invest or change personally. Letting go is when the rose colored glasses come off and you already know it's not for you, but you're afraid of starting over. Don't be afraid to change courses. If we had everything laid out for us, it would be a very boring life. We get to decide and evolve and tweak our choices to suit ourselves so we can create a perfect life though our own eyes. Nobody can give you a specific way to be happy, only you can do that for yourself. Even though there are consensus that you could use, we each have our own ideals about what is enjoyable for a lifetime.
I let Looks Hair & Apparel go. Was it easy? No. Do I regret it? No. Would I have been better off if I never tried? I can't answer that for sure because i could have been doing something else, but there's no guarantee that I would have figured out what I really value. Not having the time to write because of how consuming the store was made me realize that I truly love to write. It also showed me that I've been giving up on writing because I didn't want to put forth the effort to grow. Yea the store brought in more money than the blog but it didn't feel good. Writing is my safe haven and with more effort and investing, it will easily become more valuable than the store.
Anything that you know needs to go, I hope you find the strength to let go of it. Take some time to ask yourself why you're holding on. Only you can give yourself that answer. We only have 24 hours in a day, how and what you spend it on is up to you. Make sure the things you occupy that time with are meaningful. Once you do the thing that scares you most, everything else becomes easier.