Caring & Compassionate To A Fault

   This world is not for the weak. Kindness will get you fucked over, and the shittiest things tend to happen to the sweetest people. I can vouch for receiving unjust karma first hand. I didn’t bring this up to tell you to follow the heartless trend though. I want to let you know that you are a gem just the way you are. Severe empathy can, and will, get you chewed up and spit…  if you allow it. What many fail to realize is because we are so giving, caring, and compassionate by nature, we experience hurt often, but we also developed the ability to keep hope for positive change. Yep, I’ve been the stupid one many times. Let the same cycles replay simply because I wanted so desperately for things to work out better for all involved. They key in not becoming hardened, it’s understanding why you’re willing to put yourself in a position to be hurt repeated. 

   There’s nothing wrong with you for being human. The fact that you still genuinely care about those around you showcases just how much strength you really have. Being an asshole is the easy route. Yea, we can seem a bit naive at times, that’s because we see the potential in everyone that the world is blind to. The option of helping someone be better is a small risk in exchange for being disappointed later. Potential is a dangerous thing to get attached to, but we are willing to take the brunt of that hurt trying to help people see themselves how we see them. I guess you can say we have an unconditional view towards love and caring. Even if we kick ourselves later, we can somehow always justify our actions in wanting the best for everyone.

I’m not gonna lie to you and say love fixes all, that’s simply not true. Yes, love has the potential to heal, but only when it’s being given and received on both ends. With that in mind, remember that you can give a situation all the love in the world, but if that love is not being reciprocated, you’re pouring into a cup with a hole in it. That person, friend, situation that you keep pouring into is not your responsibility. Another trait we empaths tend to possess, is feeling responsible for fixing everything around us. Yes, nobody asked us to pour into them, we know this. This is just the way that we chose to connect to people. We just feel everything so deeply, the thought of not trying to make things better is a burden. Again, you have to learn, that is not your responsibility.

   You can help people without depleting yourself. You have to learn to value yourself equally to others. Keep spreading love and kindness, just make sure you give to yourself first. You can match what you give yourself and others, but don’t give others more than you give yourself.  When I think of giving equally, I think 50/50 out of 100. That works for material things, not for emotions and self care. Instead of a set number to give, you should consider the percentage of effort. You should always be your first priority. When you give to others, it should be 100/50 or 100/100, whatever works for you. When you don't take the time to replenish yourself, you end up with nothing left to give. You can still help with healthy boundaries to protect yourself. If you only have an hour and someone is asking for 45 minutes, don’t just fold and say yes. Designate your time first and compromise with the remaining.

   Never feel less than for seeing the world different. It’s okay to want the best for everyone. Keep seeing the world with your pure intentions. Accept that some will be grateful and some will take advantage. It doesn’t have to be a burden. Remember that you are a gift in this world, not a flaw. Continue to inspire those around you to strive for their best potential while you strive for yours.

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